Sunday, November 23, 2008

Don’t Slap Me, Because I’m Not in the Mood.


This one might catch most of you off-guard, but I don't care, because I know that once you've experienced the magic of Klymaxx, you'll be as consumed by this mid-80s girl group as I am.

Let's make it clear that I love all things 80s; it's almost a problem. The ladies of Klymaxx serve as a perfect example of how deep my passion for the Reagan-ruined decade runs, as they had very well began to fall off around the time I hopped on the scene in '86. By the time I developed any consciousness of the world around me, they were no longer a relevant part of it, but I've still managed to uncover their legacy.

If you've yet to Klymaxx, please run through the video above, I promise it's so worth the next 4 ½ minutes of your life ( don't worry, it takes a lot longer for the ladies to get you off on wax, as the album version of this song is closer to 7 minutes).

In both song and video, Meeting in the Ladies Room is pure perfection for so many reasons. From the very start, the video radiates with an aerosol-laced 80s funk that instantly makes it too authentic to be campy. From the Soultrain line that carries you into the club (can you spot the fanny pack?), to the spoken word intro that greets you at the door, ("I'd hate to become a BW: a Basic Woman") you know from the start that these chicks are so sincere w/ it. The video only gets better from there, as our BW randomly runs through the rest of the club, sporadically dancing and working that tapered and crimped bob like it's on payroll.

At first it seems easy to label the song itself as too silly to be taken seriously, but I'd beg to differ. Meeting in the Ladies Room is a masterpiece of self-awareness. These ladies realize the absurdity of the song's subject matter, and they're having as much fun with it as we are. The song is infectious, with a pop-and-lock drawl that makes it infinitely danceable, and taken as a 5-minute escape from reality, Ladies Room is as necessary as a night out after a long week.

Some moments that made me Klymaxx:

  • Why is ol'boy randomly shirtless and break-dancing in a chair, for the entire video?
  • Is this chick really rocking a wig made of Christmas Tinsel?
  • Oh gosh, she just adjusted it in the mirror.
  • Looking at the guys in this video, she might have a meeting in the men's room…cause I'm not sure any of these dudes are checking for the ladies.
  • "Don't slap me, Cause. I'm. Not. In. The. Mood." (This chick reminds me SO much of my mom…)
  • I'm sorry, is that a mermaid mannequin…seriously?

Also, check out The Men All Pause, there's more slapping. The ladies also have a slow jam that I'm sure you've heard advertised on those Best of the 80s mixtapes back in the 90s.

Please tell me you're in love.

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